Gamer Girlfriends

Anyone who has gamed for any length of time has run into the problem of gamer girlfriends. Don't get me wrong, I love having girls try gaming for the first time and it's even better when they decide to continue playing afterward. The gamer girlfriend, however, is an entirely different beast. This is a long-suffering girl, dragged along to gaming by her significant other, who has promised that this time will be different, that if she just gives it a try, she'll understand why her beau spends nearly every waking hour walking, talking, and breathing gaming. The gamer girlfriend doesn't want to understand, which is what makes this such a headache for everyone involved.

The gamer girlfriend is not a gamer herself, which is the main problem for all involved. She dates a gamer, and is therefore dragged to everything the gamer attends in the hope that she will magically fall in love with his pastimes as well as with him. I have a few guidelines (garnered from many, many bad experiences) that will hopefully make this experience less painful for everyone involved.

Guidelines for the Gamer Girlfriend:
-If you don't want to play, say so. The problem arises when you get dragged into the game against your will. There's nothing wrong with liking different things when you're a couple and respecting the fact that your interests differ makes your relationship stronger.
-If you're mildly curious, sit in on a session without playing. If you like it, there's plenty of time to ask the GM to join afterward and if you don't, you haven't alienated the other players by being miserable/bored/angry the whole time because you aren't enjoying yourself.

Guidelines for the Gamer with a Girlfriend:
-Don't make your girlfriend game if she isn't interested. Respect her feelings and don't tell yourself that she'll eventually like it.
-Don't make your girlfriend a character. If she really wants to play, she'll make it herself.
-Before you bring your girlfriend to a session, ask the GM and other players first. There's nothing worse for a gaming group than having someone assume that bringing in a new player is okay with everyone.
-If you bring your girlfriend to a session with you, reciprocate by trying one of her hobbies as well. This way, you'll both gain an understanding of one another, even if you decide you don't like the activities involved.

Guidelines for Other Players:
-Be nice. Don't ignore, mock or complain about the new addition to the group, you'll only make her experience worse.
-Be patient. Even if the girl in question would clearly rather be somewhere else, it's best to suffer in silence and raise your concerns to the GM afterward.

Guidelines for the GM:
-If the girl in question clearly doesn't want to be there, say no. There are a myriad of excuses you can come up with to turn them down without hurting their feelings (and chances are, she'll be relieved rather than upset). Asking someone to sit in on a session before playing also helps.
-Talk to the player involved and make your expectations known. As the moderator, your job is to make sure that everyone has fun, which can be difficult with someone who's been forced to play. If one session doesn't work, another go at it will probably not work either.